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Diary of a fashion intern: The satin situation

On the run up to an event I was hectically calling anyone and everyone trying to source some vile out of season flowers for a show we were working on. I hung up the phone, took a sip of water and heard the nine words I hate the most in world – ”You look bored, here’s something for you to do”. Oh, well I don’t know if you can tell, but I am already at my wits end trying to source your pompous floral arrangements that I know will be thrown out after five minutes. ”Would you mind popping out and picking up the Velamania satin dress for the shoot later”. This just wasn’t like some coffee run, this dress was hand picked by the boss for her friend and I was the unfortunate soul bestowed with the task of retrieving it. Before I even get to swallow my gulp of water I’m out the door and on the bus headed towards an art college on the other side of the city, where the dress was being altered.  It’s 11AM and the dress needs to be back for about 1. I have plenty of time. I arrive at the college and I’m greeted by a receptionist wearing a dusty blazer coupled with charity shop Doc Martins and a bad attitude. She scornfully directs me upstairs and tells me to take the second left. I pop my head around the door and see that dress. It’s a monstrosity! It would make a Benidorm drag queen wince. I somehow feel like I’ll be blamed for how hideous it is, but nonetheless I sign for it and dart out the door. On the bus headed towards the office I got a phone call – it was a florist returning my call to tell me they had those out of season florals in stock, I give them the card details and they said they’ll have them ready for the event.     When I return to the office the dress is ushered into the boss’ office by one of her bitches. The boss looks at me with a grimace as her friend swans out with the dress on, we all tell her she looks great, when in reality she looks disgraceful, like a real mess. Later, one of the bosses bitches comes over and tells me there’s been a change of plan for the floral arrangements, I nearly choke on my €1 filter coffee, she goes ”Yeah, so we’re not going to go with flowers because it’s not even spring anymore, so we’d love if you could do like a red rose, but made out of burgundy ribbons on some sticks you can get outside”. All I can say is – ”Yeah of course, thank you”.  You can follow our fashion intern on Snapchat, just simply search the name – frockadvisor
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